Monday, June 21, 2010

Quote of the Day & Some Thoughts

"If you seek escape for its own sake and run away from the world only because it is (as it must be) intensely unpleasant, you will not find peace and you will not find solitude." — Thomas Merton

I pilfered the above quote from CMack. It makes me think, as good old Thomas Merton usually does. I wish he'd follow this up with some directions about how to find peace and solitude. Living in NYC, this is sorely lacking in my life, especially with a new job that keeps me busy every minute of every day.

I used to read Thich Nhat Hanh and the Dalai Lama, they have a lot of suggestions for how to find peace and solitude. But I think Buddhist philosophy assumes you're starting out with a certain calmness that someone so prone to anxiety and distress as I am just flat-out lacks. I'm so super sensitive to everything in the world. Not just getting easily upset at comments other people make, or being super sensitive to other people's issues and problems, but I'm talking about literally everything in life. Thus the diagnosis that I am a HSP (Highly Sensitive Person). I was looking around my bathroom yesterday and laughing - all of my products are the "sensitive" version. Contact solution, toothpaste, shampoo, facewash, hair products, shaving cream, lotion - anything you can think of, I need the sensitive version. In order to go outside in the beautiful summer (hello summer, I'm so glad you're here!), I need to put on several coats of SPF 30 and drag along the bottle of sunscreen plus a baseball cap and a long-sleeved t-shirt just in case. Buddhist calm is a far ways away.

I realize this sounds like a complaint, but it's not. If I wasn't so sensitive, I wouldn't be the person I am, I know that this defines my life. But my question is, how does a hypersensitive person like me not only exist in the world (it's so difficult for me to be in a work environment with the freezing temperature and the loud coworkers... the chewing, good lord the chewing... and the pressure and the criticism), but how do we do that while gaining a sense of peace in the day-to-day? I need to figure this out, because instead I get overwhelmed, and it's not productive.

I know one answer is to not be working in this industry, which is why my future plans include a college classroom and a quiet office of my own, hopefully out of the city somewhere where there's nature and maybe water. But right now, this is where I am. So I need to find my peace. Beatles music gets me far, but not far enough. It's hard not to run away from the world to find it. I need to figure how to be in the midst of this world and find peace. One of my life's great quests.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

No place like home

Blogosphere!! How I've missed you. :) Have you missed me too?

I've been so busy lately with my new job that I've completely neglected Mad Street Cred. Epic fail, I know. I went to the OMMASocial conference today and got re-inspired about social media. Probably ironic, since now I'm working at a social media company. I think there's something about it being my job now that has kept me away. Also the fact that I'm working about 15 hours a day. But hey, I'm here now.

A few things are on my mind:

1. I really don't like when artists use auto tune. Usher was on So You Think You Can Dance tonight. I love love love Usher. But I found myself getting super annoyed with him tonight. And he's actually a good enough singer to sing without that! It ruins everything. Which reminds me... Yeah you know what I'm linking to...

2. I miss playing the piano. I am the "collaborative pianist" for a show my sister and her friend are doing at the Lower East Side Tenement Museum, and it's really fun to play through songs with them and have the songs just... work. My sister's friend told me that when she sings with me playing she feels like she's singing a duet with someone. That's probably the best compliment anyone could ever give a collaborative pianist. :) She also told me I should do it as my job. If only...

3. I am obsessed with Friday Night Lights. I never watched this show until a few weeks ago, when I was surfing around Netflix Instant as it was streaming to my Wii (LOVE), and I randomly picked out FNL to watch. FTW. That show seriously rocks. I know it's only got about one more season in the cards, and that makes me sad. It has quickly become one of my faves. How much do you just love Kyle Chandler? I've loved him ever since Early Edition. :) Ah, the shows of my youth. Anyway, go figure, I don't even like football.

4. Blogging isn't the only thing that has fallen by the wayside thanks to my new job. Here's what else: eating, sleeping, working out, fun, video games, reading, my mac, WoW, surfing the internet for fun, reading blogs, playing the guitar (and piano as stated earlier), going out with friends, dating, cleaning, laundry, listening to the Beatles or any music at all, making myself look presentable, watching TV, watching movies, any kind of extracurricular activities, did I mention sleep? Yeah. FTL.

5. I am going to Niagara Falls next weekend with Amanda. Yay, Maid of the Mist. I love boats. And trips.

This was not what I expected my blog post to be about, I was going to focus on something Very Important. But hey, at least I'm back right? I've missed you all! Time for bed.